Romanticism with style
According to the Petit Larousse, romance is “that which, by nature, touches the sensibility and imagination, invites emotion and reverie, the expression of feelings”. It is often said that romanticism is dead – or out of fashion – that men don’t keep their promises any more than the restaurant door, and that courting is a fallen art. Modern society nurtures the idea that convenience is a quality that must take precedence over everything else. From microwaveable hamburgers to one-click shoe ordering, has the 21st-century man forgotten that not all the good things in life can be obtained at the touch of a finger?
Photo by Beraldo Leal
As a child, I remember that our mothers’ first lesson in sentimental education consisted of three words: “Make yourself wanted”. Today, does shying away from the game of seduction, feigning indifference or simply wishing to take one’s time to secure a man’s feelings mean that a woman risks being preferred to the archetypal “easy girl”?
While the general trend is towards all-in-all-out, we shouldn’t paint a gloomy picture. It’s better to see today’s mores as a natural evolution, rather than a regression. Of course, the decline of romanticism naturally follows a liberating feminist movement against sexual discrimination, which questions relations between the sexes and traditional modes of seduction, ricochets off the already battered amour galant and tends to bury the idea that men should court women.
The fact remains that women generally regret that men aren’t romantic enough.
If your most romantic memory with your loved one is that of Sunday in your pyjamas, watching soap operas and eating noodles, the time has come to rekindle the candlelight of your dinner parties.
Whether you want to show your affection to a crush or to your lifelong love, trust the smallest gestures with your eyes closed. No material excuse is acceptable when it comes to being romantic, because a nice word in the ear can have as much effect as a weekend in Rome, you know, the famous “it’s the thought that counts”.
A good first step in inviting emotion and reverie is to guess what moves her, what she dreams of.
A delivery of flowers, a beautiful bouquet of roses or lilies, accompanied by chocolates if she hasn’t yet joined the anti-sugar legion, or a good bottle of wine if she likes to booze with you – these are classic pleasures, simply because they’re always touching.
If gifts aren’t unpleasant, they’re no match for a date. It’s all in the art of showing your affection with delicacy, by choosing an outing where nothing can displease the one who will share it with you. The music lover will appreciate a jazz or folk concert in a small café, while the sports enthusiast will prefer to be surprised with a duo hike, for example…
Romance may well be at your fingertips… Isn’t it enough to know how to surprise, to show that you can listen to the other person’s tastes and make the effort to create a slightly unusual situation?
At a time when male and female roles are confused, moral values are being challenged and individualism is taking precedence over sharing, gentleness and concern for others are becoming so unusual by contrast that, in the end, being romantic has never been so easy.
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