What is a woman? Or rather what makes her a woman?
I speak to you about its accessories of course and not about its anatomy, I reassure you I lost this candor concerning our differences a long time ago.
Her underwear? Her lipstick? Her stockings? Her handbag? Or her mascara?
The solution is much more symbolic.
It is an S.M. object! A torture tool that proves that women are indeed tough! This ornament of the female range comes to plant itself in the flesh of one of the most sensitive parts of their anatomy!
No, no and NO! I can see you coming with your thong on top that doubles as a rib cutter.
I’m talking about their shoes!
Indeed, men are not the only ones to be naughty perverts.
Yes, women are the most pronounced perverts in the world with their foot fetish. Yes, the “weaker” sex likes to camp out on its 4, 7, 9, 12 cm of painful pleasure!
They buy three to twelve pairs a year and 75% of these torture pairs make them suffer. They explain that the shoes hurt at first, but that this is normal because the shoe has to “fit” or “adapt” to their feet for the pain to be less pronounced…
It’s weird, it sounds like the same arguments we use for sodomy: “Don’t worry, it hurts at first, but we’ll get used to it. It has to take the mould and then it’s just pleasure”.
We men buy pairs of shoes to feel good in the first place and we throw them away when they are worn out because that’s when they hurt us.
And let’s not even talk about the price of a pair of shoes for women!
It hurts your feet and your wallet! It’s the world’s most sadistic game.
“Yes, I’m going to clack my tutunes, gi-flat the cuirrr of my wallet on the big fat counter of the store and buy myself a good pair of stilettos that are going to hurt me very very much! Hmmm YES! it’s booooon!” …
And the worst part of it all is that a man can’t tell the difference between a nice pair, a very nice pair, or even a mediocre pair of women’s shoes. He does NOT know the difference!
If he says yes, it’s because he’s lying (85% of us), he’s gay (7% of us) or he’s got a good eye (the other 8%…)
But if the men don’t see anything wrong with it, would the goal be to strut and congratulate each other between girls? To say “look at my darling’s new pair of Louboutin or Jimmy Chow” “Waaa they are too beautiful” “blablabla” (well on the other hand 85% of men are “Radio-beer-foot-ass” so no need to brag too much about useless debates)
On the other hand I must admit that I understood the women’s strategy regarding their shoes and how they manage to last a whole evening in them; First they run to the car (50 steps of pain and teeth grinding), then get out of the car and go straight to the table to sit down as fast as possible (another 50 steps of pain having almost blown out their fillings from clenching their teeth) Then they drink champagne, because when they are drunk they say “I don’t care! I don’t feel like it anymore” and you can see them galloping on their 12cm on the dance floor or they are so drunk or pretending to be drunk (gentlemen, 85% of them are pretending to be drunk) that you carry them.
Hence the sudden and strong growth in the number of women in the market in recent years; they spot the old creep full of money at his VIP table and hope to be invited so they can sit down (avoid standing with their teeth gritted on their pain) and drink champagne (anaesthetic) and on top of that they look supe cooool at the VIP table (not to mention that the old creep is still there proud as a pig in his mud surrounded by S.M. women)
On the other hand, once we’ve passed the front door of her home, our courageous lady comes up with a “take off your shoes at home” line
After all, we’re not so far off from a contradiction here.
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