Images by Antoine Delaroche stylisme Mogany Pichanchourt
For some time now, our eyes have been horrified by the sight of women who come to us with pretty dresses, jackets, tights, leggings, handbags and other feminine condiments covered with zebra or leopard-like patterns.
It is called in the complicated jargon of fashion; the amazon style. If that’s not class!
This Welcome to the Jungle revival is a sorry sight.
Perched like giraffes on twelve centimeters heels, they chase the man with a lioness look. Like cougars they pounce on their prey and do the pans with their jungle colored paraphernalia to lure us into their clutches.
It’s a pity that they can’t bury their heads in the sand and hide when they’re being mocked while strutting around on a catwalk in front of cafés.
The bitch-attitude glossed over with animal props unfortunately doesn’t make us want to chase them, let alone shoot them.
Isn’t it sad to see that the has-been kit from the 80’s is being brought out again? Meanwhile, men fantasize about getting rid of the outfit, but out of a sense of taste they are not crazy enough to let the animal skin sit in the middle of their living room, let alone at the foot of their bed.
No, it does not have you ladies!
Besides dealing with a picturesque animal documentary, you look like a horde of Johnny Hallyday fans a few years away from retirement when you are not yet in your thirties.
Strutting around like this in the human savannah and black of eyes only gives hints of primal instincts to the men who push them to bark in pack when they see these gazelles passing. It’s a good thing that these wizards don’t throw them the peanuts that are at their tables.
Not to mention that the whole thing is reminiscent of the old-fashioned spandex costumes of the old Batman in the 1960s TV version. And no, we are not in costume!
Know that it is as attractive as if you had a soccer player straight out of the 80’s with a mullet and leopard print kangaroo briefs.
This black leather skirt and cheetah top look is straight out of a bad German porn movie hidden under our parents’ bed or from Roberta hidden behind a bush in the Bois de Boulogne jungle.
So put away your punk kitsch, the zoo will close its doors
Fred Joker Gourdin